Quitting
by Hydra-Star
Summary: A calloused thumb lightly traced circles on her back, sending shivers up her spine. She had seen his hands crush strong men, but he’d never hurt her. Zoro couldn't be called a gentle man in anything he did, but in his arms she’d always felt safe. ZoNa


**Disclaimer:** I don't own One Piece

--

"Why do we keep doing this?" Nami asked.

"Why not?" His voice was deep and husky. She struggled for an answer.

"Because sex isn't something to be taken lightly. If it doesn't mean anything…"

"You need release. I need release." He shrugged and she sighed. Trust Zoro to over simplify everything. She sat up, bringing the sheets with her. How long had it been since that first night? A month now? She had come to him, but he'd never pushed her away. She wondered now why she had chosen Zoro of all people. Surely Sanji would have been a better choice. He would be thrilled to have her. He would love her tenderly, and maybe she would even think she loved him back, until one day she broke his heart. That was easy. That was how her relationships with men had always gone in the past.

A calloused thumb lightly traced circles on her back, sending shivers up her spine. She had seen his hands crush strong men, but he'd never hurt her. He wasn't gentle by any sense of the word. Zoro could never be called a gentle man in anything he did, but in his arms she'd always felt safe. She _liked_ that he was forceful with her. He didn't treat her like some delicate flower. But even in the bedroom he never showed her what he really felt about her. Her only evidence that he actually enjoyed their nights together was that he kept coming back. Yes, Sanji would have been a better choice. She never knew what Zoro was thinking. Sanji was easier to read.

"Maybe we should stop," she said quietly. The thumb stopped, then was pulled away.

"Why?"

"Because… Because we should." She could feel his intense gaze on her back.

"Give me a reason, Nami."

"Because I don't want to anymore." Her voice was soft. She wondered if she'd hurt him. Did he care?

Zoro stood, sliding out of the bed. He quickly found his clothes, tugging them on. She stared at him. He really didn't care, did he? No other man had ever walked away so easily. They had at least put up _some_ fight.

"That's it?" she asked. He looked at her out of the corner of his eye.

"Yup."

"You're not going to argue?" He shrugged.

"What's the point?" She stared at him. He returned her gaze evenly.

"There isn't one," she finally said, hearing her voice go cold. She turned away from him and lay back down. He reached a hand out to her, then hesitated and let it drop. He left her room, retreating to the men's sleeping quarters of the Going Merry. It wasn't yet midnight. He had plenty of time to get some sleep still. The next day would be like any other day. He would exercise, sleep on the deck, eat, and repeat. Nothing had really changed. He'd never expected this thing he had with Nami to last. He'd never had any delusions about her caring.

Nami let a tear fall down one cheek. Why the hell was she crying? Over Zoro, no less! She wasn't some weak, lovesick girl. She angrily wiped the tear away. How had she let herself become so attached? When had that happened?

She slipped on a robe and quietly opened the door and watched his retreating back.

"Wait," she called softly. Half of her hoped her wouldn't hear, but he turned and looked at her. "Do you care about me at all?" she asked. She sounded pathetic, even to her. His expression was unreadable.

"You're my nakama," he said. She smiled bitterly.

"Is that all?"

"What do you want me to say, Nami?"

"I…" She shook her head. "Never mind." She slipped back into her room, shutting the door with a soft click. He stared at where she'd been. Slowly he opened the door. She was on her bed. Her back was to him. She was so frustrating. Why couldn't she just come out and say what she wanted? He sat on the side of the bed. She didn't move, but he saw her stiffen slightly. He ran a finger down her cheek and over her neck. She shivered and he felt the beast roar within him. He loved that he could do that to her.

"What are you doing?" she asked softly. He pushed her shoulder so she was lying on her back. When she tried to look away he placed a hand under her chin.

"What do you want from me, Nami?" he asked. She stared at him, her eyes wide.

"I want…" She stopped. He waited patiently for her to continue. "I don't know what I want, Zoro," she whispered. He smirked slightly. She didn't want him to leave.

"You want this," he said, kissing her. She gasped and he used the opportunity to deepen the kiss. Her hands pushed against his chest, but he didn't stop. He couldn't stop.

SLAP

Nami stared at the red mark on his cheek. Had she just slapped Zoro? He pulled himself away from her, still sitting on the edge of the bed but now looking at the opposite wall. It didn't hurt him so much as shock him. He'd thought… But clearly he'd been wrong. He stood and left, leaving her there in the dark.

--

Nami's scream was cut short as metal clashed with metal. Zoro stood above her. She hadn't thought he could still stand after his fight, but clearly she, like so many others, had underestimated the swordsman. He was bloody all over. She didn't think there was a single part of him that wasn't wounded in some way. Why did he keep doing this to himself?

Swords clashed again. Zoro blocked each of the man's attacks, but it wasn't with his normal ease. His breathing was labored and she thought she heard fluid in his lungs. She ducked around the corner, watching with a wide-eyed fascination.

Zoro yelled, bringing up his swords. They came crashing down on the man. The enemy gasped, then collapsed. Zoro swayed where he stood. He looked around searchingly.

"Nami?" he called softly, then louder. "Nami!" She left her hiding spot and approached him. He smiled slightly, resting his head on her shoulder. He breathed in her scent. For a few minutes there she had scared him, but she was okay.

"Zoro, you're bleeding on my clothes. I'm going to add it onto your debt, y'know." He let out a small grunt. His debt was already at an insurmountable amount. A little more wouldn't really change anything. Both of them knew he'd never really pay her back.

"I'm glad you're okay too, Nami," he said quietly. She felt tears sting her eyes, but she didn't let them fall. She wasn't a crier.

"Why do you keep doing this to yourself?" she asked, rapping her arms around his neck. Why do you keep hurting yourself to protect me?

"I have to get better." She sighed.

"That's what you always say. Come on. Let's get you to Chopper." He reluctantly pushed himself away from her and followed. The world was spinning with every step he took, but she never needed to know that. What was important was that once again another island was saved, Luffy and his crew had protected a new group of friends, and once again Nami had come away from the matter unharmed. This was just another adventure for the Straw Hat pirates.

It had been three years since that night. He hadn't forgotten. Neither had she.

Chopper was barely able to convince Zoro to stay in bed for a day. The next morning he was lifting his huge weights, despite the reindeer's protests, and the Thousand Sunny was heading for their next island.

Sanji crooned over Nami as she lazily sipped her drink. She ignored him. The newspaper was more interesting. She scanned the articles, looking for something that would interest her. Luffy bounced around the deck, and when Sanji realized he'd gotten into the meat again a rather loud chase ensued. She sighed and retreated to the room she and Robin shared. Even after all this time they were the only women in the crew.

Robin was already there. The two girls smiled at each other, understanding each other perfectly. The need for silence every once in a while was something they both shared. Nami stretched out on her bed and stared at the ceiling. What if things had gone differently with Zoro? Even now there were so many what ifs. She wished things could be different, but it seemed that that night they passed the point of no return.

She couldn't sleep that night. Finally she left her room, going out on the deck. She never expected to see Zoro there, particularly not awake. The only time Zoro ever seemed to come up on the deck was to lie in the sun like a cat. He was leaning against the rail, looking out across the ocean. She pulled herself up so she was sitting on the rail next to him.

"You're up late," she said.

"So're you," he replied. She shrugged. They were silent for a while. She found herself looking at his arm. He'd gathered scars over the years. Two parallel lines ran from his elbow to his wrist. She gently traced one with her index finger. He watched as she traced the other one as well.

"I remember when you got these," she said softly. There had been a storm and she'd fallen over board. He'd caught her. She'd been hanging off the side of the boat with only his hand keeping her from going in the water. Something had gotten loose and fallen. It had cut him deeply, but he'd never even flinched. He'd never gone to Chopper. If he had he probably wouldn't have the scars. He said nothing. He was watching her with a look in his eyes she hadn't seen for three years. That beast like want for her that he carried. She felt herself shiver.

He mistook her shiver for cold. Gently he rapped an arm around her, pulling her a bit closer to him.

"What're you doing," she whispered.

"You're cold," he explained. She didn't correct him. Instead she leaned her forehead against his shoulder. She was still sitting on the rail facing him. She brought up her hand and gripped his shirt in it.

"Damn it, Nami," he whispered.

"What?" He didn't respond. Instead, his grip on her tightened. She waited for him to elaborate. He sighed and let her go, turning from her and starting to walk back inside. She almost whimpered. She wanted him to come back and hold her again.

"Wait!" She slid off the rail. He stopped and turned to her. "What was that?" she asked. He clenched and unclenched his fist, his brown knitted into a frown. Finally he shrugged. Nami felt her temper rising.

"No," she said. "You don't get to do this to me. You don't get to leave me here wondering. What do you want from me, Zoro?"

"What do I want from you?"

"That's what I asked." He stared at her, frustration written over every inch of his face. Three years ago he'd asked her the same thing. She'd never really answered. She punched his chest. The blow didn't hurt. She knew she couldn't hurt him. She punched him again, and again.

"Why are you doing this to me?" she asked. He caught her wrist. She growled, trying to tug away, but she couldn't match his strength. She hit him with her other hand. He caught that too. She tried to pull away, but instead she found herself being pulled towards him. The he was kissing her hungrily. She hesitated, then returned the kiss with just as much hunger. Finally he pulled away.

"Damn it, Nami," he whispered. His voice was low and husky. "You're like a drug and I just can't quit you. Three years and I still can't quit you." Her arms went around his neck.

"I can't quit you either," she whispered and he kissed her again.

--


End file.
